Sunday, November 2, 2008

One Year

It is amazing how much difference a year can make in your life. I don't think I really notice the day to day differences in my health until something triggers a memory or something. Last Halloween I can remember that by the time I got Lizzie dressed and ready I was already feeling tired and pooped. In fact, I didn't go with her and Sean to do the downtown tricker treating. Our main street does tricker treating from 3 -6 and the stores hand out candy. It is probably a 6 block radius and you can go up one side, then down the other. Last year it would have exhausted me to walk that far, not to mention my anxiety would have been out the roof - "what?? walk that far without food? what if I get low blood sugar???" You might think I am joking, but the truth is, my anxiety level had actually dropped quite a bit at that point. Yea - I used to be REALLY a nutcase!!

At the point when my anxiety was it's worse, about 2 1/2 years ago I could not even be on a grocery store aisle alone! I couldn't even walk into a store without my mom or my husband!! I used to be embarrassed about my anxiety and tried to hide it from everyone and for sure would have never admitted what I just did to the whole world wide web!! Do you know why? Cuz I really was afraid that I was just crazy and belonged in an institution or something! In fact, I wonder how many poor souls are in mental hospitals right now that actually aren't crazy at all - just have something physical going on that no one has figured out yet?

Anyway - back to good things! This year I tricker treated with my daughter for an hour and a half on main street. Then we went to two carnivals after that. We went with friends and all had a blast!!! I could not believe my stamina!!! It was about 90% better than the year before, which was about 100% better than the year before that!! Boy, in a few years I will be like Wonder Woman or something!!! I am joking here - but I have actually teared up several times this weekend because my heart is so full of gratitude for the healing I have recieved physically, emotionally, and spiritually. All glory goes to my Heavenly Father - who heard my cries and pleas and reached down and picked me up!!!


Shellmo said...

So glad to hear about your fun time! I think you will be Wonder Woman in no time! :-)

citizen of the world said...

I'm so glad this year is so much better for you.