Hard to be good

I wonder why most times it is so easy to do the right things in life, then I have days when it is really a stuggle. Is this human nature or am I just a freak of nature? Today is one of those days. Days when it is hard to just bite my tongue and not tell certain people what I REALLY think. Hard to not let my mind wander and think on things that are just not where my mind should be wandering. Days I want to be selfish and do what I want regardless of the consequences... So, instead of sending that email that I have written twice now and deleted because I know I shouldn't send it, I will blog instead, hoping this will get it out of my system.

The play for Jake and Lizzie is coming along very well. They are both doing great. Jake is one of the oldest, there is one other girl that is 15 in it. The truth is though... he looks like Goliath. I certainly do not think he knows that he is a foot taller than the next tallest person there. He reminds me a bit of Sean's old hunting dog. He was 85 pounds, but would still try to climb into my lap like he did when he was a puppy. Jake seems so large on the outside, yet so small on the inside at times. Today was one of those rare glimpses. There is still a boy lurking inside that man sized body. I am so proud of the man he is becoming, but will always love the boy he was, and am glad to catch a glimpse of it occasionally!

OK...I feel better, maybe I can go and attempt to be the woman God wants me to be instead of the wicked witch of the west that keeps emerging today for some reason!