I am still on Sean's computer so I do not have access to my pictures. I thought I would give you a sample of the pictures on his computer that I do have access to. I am sorry, but for the life of me I just can't figure out how to blog about farrier tools, airplanes, or crests.
It is just not in me. So, I will tell you what is happening with me.
Something has taken over and I have no way to explain it. I have never been so excited about life as long as I can remember. Even with this time change I wake up before my alarm, too excited about the day to stay in bed. Those of you that know me well, know I LOVE to sleep in, so you realize the great extent of my excitement. It is like I can not wait for the day to actually arrive so I can get moving. And I do mean get moving.
I was a swimmer all of my childhood and teen years. To be honest, I was pretty damn good at it, too. I held the regional backstroke record at my school from 1986 until I don't know when. When we moved to Montana in 1998 my name was still up there on the board. I am assuming at this point someone has finally broken it. My point is this, I have not really exercised much since that time. Then when I was sick - if I even exercised for 10 minutes I would detox and feel horrible for 2 days. Well, I started walking in september. Not much, I would do 10 - 15 minutes on the treadmill about 3 days a week. Well, a couple of weeks ago I decided to get serious about this. I started taking Slimplicity and walking 4 - 5 days a week. The longest I have walked so far has been 27 minutes. My cravings for sweets has decreased dramatically with the slimplicity. I am addicted to the scales, and then if I am not losing the amount of weight I should, then I get frustrated, so I am not going to weigh until March 24th, that will be a month from when I started. I can tell I am losing inches though from my clothes.
Another thing is my anxiety. I have mentioned it on here before, but I did not leave my house without my mom or my husband for about 4 years. I started driving with my kids about 8 or 9 months ago, and that was really freeing, but I have yet to venture out on my own. I feel safe with Reagan, cuz I know if I needed her to, she could drive. See, the anxiety comes from years of getting sick and when I would have my allergic reactions I could not remember how to get home, or anywhere else - so I quit driving. So, over the past month I have been taking short treks out on my own. Yesterday I did actually drive to town, with Sean in his truck several miles behind me. I drove all of my errands in town alone. I did flip out one time when I called his cell phone and he did not answer. Then I spent the next 30 minutes mentally bashing myself for being an idiot. I did a lot of negative self talk about how a grown woman should not be scared to be in town alone, etc... which was unproductive. Finally I realized that the point is that I am doing it, I am trying. I want to live life to the fullest and am going to continue to grow as much as I can.
So, you see I am going through a lot of personal growth and it is scary and exciting at the same time. I am LOVING life right now!