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25 Random Things about Me

I was tagged on Facebook to do this and thought I would carry it over to here - If you would like to join the fun, consider yourself tagged! I found it interesting, and also hard to think of 25 things!


1. My first name is Mary but I have always gone by my middle name, Michele
2. Cooking is my therapy
3. I was sick and spent 90% of my time in bed for about 5 years
4. I was also suicidal during that time - suicidal everyday, the only thing that kept me from killing myself was the thought of the trauma it would bring my kids.
5. I LOVE LOVE LOVE Grey's Anatomy
6. I was a dental hygienist for 10 yrs
7. My mom is my neighbor, right next door, she brought me potato soup for lunch today - I love my mom!
8. I enjoy blogging very much
9. I got married two months after graduating high school, and we are still married
10. I was raised southern baptist and am now Episcopalian
11. I love to watch snow falling
12. I work from home very part time and make a good income.
13. I can rarely see the top of my desk
14. My drink of choice is always a margarita
15. I am really enjoying getting to know people again on FB
16. I check my email about 20 times a day - really, it is an addiction with me!
17. I have wanted a chihuahua all my life, well as long as I can remember, and have had Chica for 3 yrs now
18. I sleep with a CPAP machine for Sleep Apnea
19. I get the giggles at funerals sometimes - I think it must be nervousness - it is AWFUL to start laughing with bad timing
20. I do not like coffee
21. I have not had a coke in about 8 years - or any other soda
22. I love my sister very much but we fight often
23. Pajamas are my favorite thing to wear
24. I have 4 cats - but no mice
25. I cherish my family and friends very much and consider you one of the greatest treasures in my life!

Some reasons I love Montana

Lower Falls of the Grand Canyon of the Yellowstone in Autumn

Lower Falls of the Grand Canyon of the Yellowstone in Winter

Bighorn Sheep

Baby Foxes

The Bridger Mountains

The Bridgers at sunset

Near Mammoth Hot Springs, Yellowstone Nat Park

Montana State University, Bozeman, MT

Mama Elk and her fawn

The Power of One

We watched this tonight. I would highly recommend it. It is from the early 90's, but it has a great story to it. If you enjoy movies about overcoming, standing up for what is right and watching people come together in spite of great obstacles, then you just might like it as well. Be prepared, it is sad in many ways. Partly sad because even though it is just a movie - it shows the struggles of many people through out the world due to discrimination. Perfect timing in light of Obama's Election! If you do see it, or if you already have, I would love to know what you thought of it.

C is for the Children's Museum

Our Children's Museum in Bozeman is pretty small compared to others I have seen - but it is the only one Lizzie has ever been in and she thinks it is super!

Lizzie and her dear friend Caitlynn (also a C!) rowing down river - I think they are Lewis and Clark!

Lizzie does not dress up at home - in fact, she runs around in her undies 90% of the time! But here, she loves to dress up!!

The camera is actually aimed straight up, see the ceiling light? This is a contraption that blows out a pretty strong force of air. They have different balls to place in the air flow and be sustained, but Lizzie just loves to stick her face in it!!

Mr Darcy

Here is Chica defending her territory - our bed. What is she defending it from you might ask? Well, it is a whom actually and several of them. She feels that NO cat should come near her night time domain. I wish I had a picture of the toothy snarl she gives the cats if they come within a foot of the bed. Of course when she actually goes to sleep she crawls down under the covers and pays no attention. Sometimes we wake up with two or three cats on the bed - and her oblivious down there by my feet! Nothing disturbs her beauty sleep! Look at those buggy little chihuahua eyes - she needs all the beauty rest she can get!! :)

Since you met Squeak the other day, it is only fair to introduce you to Mr Darcy. Squeak belongs to Jake, and Mr Darcy belongs to Reagan, and yes, he is named after Mr Darcy in Pride and Prejudice. Now, Milo is Elizabeth's cat and he looks exactly like Mr Darcy, only a slightly darker orange. They are brothers and sometimes if the room is not well lit, I have trouble telling which one is which. Not the kids though, they always know - and do NOT let me hear the end of it when I confuse the two. "Oh my gosh! Can't you tell Milo is darker?!" Well, honestly, I can't at times!

Squeak

I would like to introduce you to Squeak. See that scowl on his face? That is not a moment of grumpiness, he looks like that all the time. He is a precious kitty and we love him, but he looks grumpy all the time. He is not grumpy though and his grumpy little face is very enduring.

So is this odd way he likes to lay around on the furniture all spread eagle. We love our little Squeak!

Honesty

I was trying to decide what to blog about today, and am going with a totally honest blog. It scares me anytime I truly put my feelings out for all to see - I have deep seeded fears of rejection and abandonment. That is why I often keep things inside if I feel strongly about something. I feels like a part of me, and therefore if my idea is rejected, then I feel rejected.

Today, I feel I need to risk it. I did not vote for Obama. I did not like McCain much either, but did like his Tax plan and his Iraq stance more. I had a good friend that actually interned with George W for a few years back in Texas. I heard good stories about him all the time. Even though I do not agree with all he did while in office, I do think he is a genuine good guy. He treated the people that worked with him with utmost respect and was very kind. I think it is sad that he leaves office taking all the blame in people's eyes. I am not sure why in America, we do not allow congress to take the blame for their part. The president can not put anything into place that does not pass Congress, yet he is 100% blamed.

I watched Obama yesterday and cried many times through out. I very much enjoyed watching this moment in our American history. Just as I get sick of hearing Bush constantly bashed, I am even more upset with the people that are still bashing Obama. I honestly can NOT even believe that people are still sending all those half false emails about Obama being a terrorist, etc... It is ridiculous. Now, is the time to stop being petty and come together as a nation - no matter what side you consider yourself on. This division in our country has gone on long enough. We must decide we have more to gain by stopping the hate - both sides - and joining together. The sad thing is that deep down we all want the same things - we just have different ideas of how to get there. I will tell you the truth, I think Obama might just be the exact man to get it done!

I may not have voted for Obama - but I am supporting him 100% at this point. He is not just the President, he is now MY president. I hope he goes in there and blows people's socks off. I hope he begins to make change for our country, because God knows we need it. Change that will help our children and their children. I hope he is able to change how the world views us, because it is actually embarrassing.

I may not have voted for Obama last November, but I stand here today, January of 2009 proud to have seen him sworn in. I will be praying for him and his precious family.

As a believer in Jesus Christ I do not put my faith in Obama, or Bush or any other human. I know who is taking care of me, and it is not the government. I have total faith in my God and He has total control - Lord knows I prayed enough times during the election for God's will to be done. I trust it was.

B is for Bad Hotels!

We had a Reliv Road trip this past weekend! We laughed and laughed due to our "interesting" accommodations!! When my dear friend, Heather, came to the car with this light covered luggage cart - I said, "well, it has lights!" Heather commented, "well, we would need a long extension cord to enjoy them!"

So, if the cart didn't tip us off, the "newly remodeled room" that started with this paint job should have. Come on, ten minutes of sanding would have made a HUGE difference.

The Fairfield Inn by Marriot was mocking us from across the street!! For the same PRICE!! uuuurrrggghhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have no idea why we had a screen sitting in the corner of our room. Our windows had screens?

Yes, that IS dirt all over the air conditioner. It also kicked on cold air every 30 minutes all night long.

See that light shining thru the door connecting us to the adjoining room? We could also hear them run the water in their sink.

This is a cheeze it or something and other crumbs under mom's bed!

And just in case you are thinking it was ALL bad - look at our fabulous flat screen TV! Although we never even turned it on!! We had fun though, a girl trip with NO kids - that seldom happens. I hope I remember these fun trips with my mom and friends forever! In the big scheme of life a Bad hotel is not that big of a deal, but on the next road trip, we will ask a few more questions!!

Sundays

This is St James Episcopal Church, Bozeman, MT. I LOVE this church. I get to go there in a few hours, which just thrills me with excitement. I also LOVE Sundays. Which I just realized this morning is a fairly recent feeling for me. I always felt depressed on Sundays - ALL my life, or as far back as I can remember.

When I was a kid, Sunday meant tomorrow was school. When I was in college - same thing. Then as an adult, Sunday meant that tomorrow, Monday, was back to the grindstone! Maybe it is really Mondays that I hated and that just started seeping over about Sunday afternoon and ruining the end of a perfectly good weekend.

When I think about where I am in life now, my chest actually feels so full of emotion I could burst in song or tears! I feel so grateful to be at a place in life where everyday feels good. I can love Sundays now and Mondays have become one of my favorite days of the week. I wish someone would have told me to think outside of the box long ago!! I wish someone would have said, "If you are not happy, then move on until you find what makes you happy." Now, I am not talking about the occasional bad day, I am talking about if there is something in my world that causes me unrest over and over again - then something needs to change! So, that comes down to determining if it is something I have control over changing or not.

I learned something recently: A goal is something I have complete control over. A desire is something that requires participation from me and another person. I have set desires for myself at times when I thought I was setting goals. I set goals for myself that did not happen because there were other aspects that I could not control, like someone else's free will!! So, I have felt like a failure many times when in truth, I did not realize that there is a difference in a goal and a desire.

So, I have a goal to seek through prayer and other ways what my choices should be for my future. I have a desire to be in good relationship with my kids and husband and to keep a clean house. I have a goal to be available, and not on the phone, to my kids and husband for some quality time each day. I have a goal to finish jobs I start around the house and work at organization each day. Now, I can't control if my kids or husband does not want to be in relationship with me - that is out of my control. I could have a goal of a spotless house if I lived alone with no people or pets contributing to the mess. I guess I am just rambling at this point, but I find it intriguing that I have confused desires with goals for 40 years and felt a failure many times because of it.

I am NOT failure. And I LOVE Sundays and Mondays!! I am very grateful.

Tag

I was tagged by Jen (http://unglazed.blogspot.com/2009/01/tag-im-it.html ) !! I was excited because I have never been tagged before!! The rules are: open a document or file folder, click on the fifth folder and then the fifth photo. Post the photo and describe it.

This is the Coventry Choir at St James Episcopal Church last year. Lizzie is smack dap in the middle.

Now I tag:

Citizen

Cassie

Shelley

Friar

Sean

Mom

I was thinking about how as a mom the job never really ends. Jake has a stomach virus. This is not a picture of Jake with the stomach, virus, I thought I would spare you that! Anyway, we were up very late because even with 4 ibuprofen and 2 Tylenol he was still running a fever of 103.6. It finally dropped about midnight and I put on my PJs and went to bed. He has always been our sick kid. Ear tubes 3 times before the age of 2, tonsils out at 4, a 3 week stay in ICU at the age of 13 months for asthma and croup they couldn't get under control.

His health has improved GREATLY taking Reliv, but he is not totally consistent. I have begged and bribed, but he is 16 and therefore he knows much more than me about the world!! :) But, back to my point. There we are at 11pm and he looks up at me and says, "I'm scared." In that moment I felt very honored to be his mom. Honored because he could be vulnerable in front of me, which is rare these days at his age. Honored because we have been through a lot together and we are still able to come together and get through difficult things. During all of this, I called my mom, who then waited up until I called back and said all was fine and we were going to bed. So, my point is about being a mom. The job description should read: "Want to experience extreme frustration and endless joy at the same time? Apply here - oh yea, and it is a lifelong job. There is no ending date." Because the truth is, I always thought once they were grown they wouldn't need me anymore! I am kinda glad I was wrong on that one!

On a side note: I found my cell phone. Well, Sean found it - when the snow melted a bit it was in the driveway! and it still WORKS!!! amazing!! no wedding ring yet, but my hope is renewed!!

Splinters in Life

Poor Little Lizzie got a splinter the other day. When looking at these photos I couldn't help but think how this applies to my own life at times. When something unexpected happens that is uncomfortable, or even painful I want to fix it myself. Even if someone that is much stronger than me or has more knowledge than me is standing right there waiting to help, I can be stubborn. The entire splinter episode with Lizzie took about an hour. Forty - five minutes of that was her trying to remove it herself. Once she finally consented to help, we got it out in about 15 minutes.

Look at that pitiful face. When I see someone I love hurting, I want to rush in a fix it for them. This is not always what they want or even need. Sometimes, unfortunately we need to go through hard things. That is just life. It is not God punishing us or not caring, it is life in an imperfect world, period.

This is her last ditch attempt to fix it herself. She was grasping at straws here. "Maybe water will just wash it right out" she said. I do this in my life. Instead of just turning to the help offered, I am desperately trying to fix it myself and getting more frustrated by the minute. It was after this that she finally decided we could help her.

This is the splinter. It went straight in, so all we saw was the tip of the wood, had NO idea it was this large. I am SO glad when something painful happens that we can not actually see how big of an obstacle it is. When I became ill, if I would have known I would spend 90% of the next five years of my life in bed, I think I might have just thrown in the towel right then and there. Yea, I think NOT always knowing what is ahead and just living one day at a time is how it needs to be.

I wish I would have gotten a picture of Lizzie's smile when that thing finally came out. I was too busy holding her and loving on her and celebrating with her. Because when we make it through, and that WILL happen, it is time to celebrate. Celebrate our endurance, our persistence, and celebrate life! Yea, some days suck and we merely survive - but others? Well, those days are just AMAZINGLY AWESOME - like today!

Remember

Do you remember Jake filmed for a National Geographic film? Well, it airs tonight. So, if you don't have anything to do - it is at 8pm, Explorers - Virus Hunters, on the National Geographic Channel. We have no idea if his hands made the cut or not - guess we will find out tonight. The show is about life starting with viruses....sounds intriguing anyway.

A is for Adorable!

I am joining Jen in her A - Z postings on mondays. A is for adorable Lizzie. She came to breakfast in her dad's sweatshirt. YES, she went into my room, found it on the floor and put it on before heading down the stairs today. She loves her daddy very much. When he works his 48 hour shift at the Fire Station she has terrible withdrawal! Some shifts are harder than others, obviously. When he came home on Sunday she attached herself to him like a parasite. I am not even sure how he managed to go to the bathroom alone!

She just finished her toast...blackberry jam - YUM!! I think she may be wearing more than she actually ate!